Wednesday, March 31, 2004

My Kilt

(31) Well, I finally broke down and ordered a kilt from Utilikilts. I saw Patrick Norton wear one on The Screensavers a year or so ago and ordered a catalog. I hemmed and hawed about for a year. Then, last week, I ordered it. It was shipped from Seattle on Monday.

The folks at Utilikilts gave me a UPS tracking number for it, and I have been watching my kilt's progress across the country. It was given to UPS at 9:10 pm Monday, and left Seattle at 11:24 pm. On Tuesday at 5:05 am it arrived at Hermiston, Oregon, and left there at 7:42 am. It reached Salt Lake City at 12:23 am Wednesday, and at 3:48 am left for its next stop.

It arrived at Commerce City, Colorado at 1:23 pm, and spent 10 hours lounging around, and smoking cigarettes in the UPS waiting room before leaving at 11:49 pm.

I bring all this up because I am amazed that someone actually thought about where to put UPS shipping centers! Except for Seattle and Salt Lake City, and eventually San Antonio, the centers are in places I've never heard of. It's fun, in an insane kind of way, to watch your package make its way to you.

Friday, March 19, 2004

Lord, save us from the New Puritans!

(19) Time for Jeff to go ballistic! Here's the link.

The Colorado Legislature is considering a law that would make it a crime to show any material with sexual content to anyone under 18. The proposed bill -- House Bill 1078 -- will make it a criminal offense for any "play, dance or exhibition displaying pictures, drawings, video recordings, films, books or magazines to depict nudity or sexual activity to a person who is younger than eighteen years of age." The law requires establishments -- including bookstores, museums, libraries and theaters -- who sell or merely display any "real or perceived depictions of sexuality or sexual activity" to require identification before showing such materials to any patron, to ensure that the viewer is 18 or older.

Has anyone in the Colorado legislature read the bible?

Adam knew Eve. My pastor explained in church one Sunday morning what that sentence meant. For those who weren't in church that day, it means Adam and Eve had sexual intercourse. After Noah landed his ark, his daughters got him drunk and had their way with him and became pregnant. The men of Sodom and Gomorrah wanted to have sex with the male angels who were visiting Lot. Lot offered them his virgin daughters. And should I even mention The Song of Solomon? That whole book is nothing but a hot love letter to Solomon's girlfriend. "Thy two breasts are like two young roes that are twins, which feed among the lilies./ Until the day break, and the shadows flee away, I will get me to the mountain of myrrh, and to the hill of frankincense." (chapter 4, verses 5-6.) (This is why the Old Testament is much more interesting than the New.)

High School students will not be taught about the Renaissance, or at the very least, will only be told it happened and shown the Mona Lisa. Da Vinci's nudes, and Michelangelo's David are illegal under this law. (Nudity.)

"National Lampoon's Animal House" will have to be sent to the back of the video stores. Any movie that makes a reference to sex is illegal. Say goodbye to "Look Who's Talking." And can you imagine what would happen should a child under 18 watch daytime TV? Not only would "Jerry Springer" be gone, so would any soap opera.

Sounds to me like someone in Colorado is deathly afraid that someone, somewhere might be having fun. But it fits right in with our nation's attorney general has ordered the statue of Justice, in the department of the same name, covered with drapes, so that we are not exposed to an errant breast.

Unless we're watching the Super Bowl.

Lord, save us from Puritans!

Thursday, March 11, 2004

More on Chasing the Sun

(11) I am currently working on chapter nine of Chasing the Sun. It is the part I have been looking forward to and dreading at the same time. It's the chapter about the Nagasaki Okunchi festival. I wasn't sure I would be able to draw the Dragon Dance which is the inspiration for the title. Here is a sample for you to judge how I did.